Jen’s Story: How a Near Death Experience Pushed Me to Reduce Hours at Work

heatherkaystanfield
Aug 27
3 min read

Updated: 7 days ago

Jen K. is a mother working up to 60 hours a week in healthcare. Despite being in this field, she still encountered problems with her own health due to the high demands of an unsustainable workload. These health issues were so severe that she came close to death. This is her story.

"I ended up very close to death. That was very eye opening for me."

“I was working so hard, and doing so much overtime, that I was working 60 hours a week. It ultimately made my health go down the drain. I was getting 3 hours of sleep; I was exhausted all the time.

Suddenly I ended up in the hospital with Acute Kidney Injury because I wasn’t eating or drinking enough. I was working so hard that it took a toll on me. I was so committed to helping everyone else - my kids, my patients, my coworkers - that I didn’t pay any attention to my own needs.

When someone would point it out to me, I would say I was fine. I always felt like I was fine, because I’m a strong person, but at the same time I wasn’t taking care of myself.

I had other [chronic] health issues, and I didn’t like taking my meds or following the doctor’s orders because of the medication side effects. I would give the same advice to my patients, while neglecting myself. It’s hard to take your own advice, and I think a lot of mothers and caregivers can relate to that.

I ended up very close to death. That was very eye opening for me, and now I don’t work overtime anymore. I make time to eat and drink fluids and pay better attention to my mental health. This has helped me recuperate and feel better.”

- Jen K.

"I was so committed to helping everyone else...that I didn’t pay any attention to my own needs."

Self-Care = Putting Yourself First

Jen’s story is moving and powerful. Working full-time, especially extended hours or overtime, puts us at a higher risk of neglecting our own needs. It’s difficult to balance work and home, self-care and obligations, helping others and helping yourself. It’s important to remember that you cannot pour from an empty cup. It is imperative to fill your own cup first, so you have something left over to give. While taking care of others is a noble act, doing so at the sacrifice of your own mental or physical health is a slippery slope.

"It’s hard to take your own advice, and I think a lot of mothers and caregivers can relate to that."

Taking care of yourself while working full-time can seem like an incredibly daunting task, especially for those with chronic health issues. It’s okay to ask for help, or to let go of some less pressing responsibilities in order to prioritize yourself more. One tip is to use the Eisenhower Matrix Method of setting tasks, as shown below:

Prioritizing Work and Personal Life: The Eisenhower Matrix

In this scenario, Jen could prioritize her work tasks and personal tasks with an Eisenhower Matrix. She could decide what is absolutely necessary to have completed (such as vital work tasks), what can be delegated (non-important work tasks, family affairs), and what tasks are not hers to complete.

Taking the Eisenhower Matrix a step further, it is suggested to limit the number of items in the “Important, Do First” and the “Unimportant, Schedule” tasks to avoid overwhelm or setting yourself up for difficulty later on. A “Top 3” or “Top 5” to-do list is also helpful to ensure you focus only on the priorities for the day that can be completed within your energy restraints. These tips are often used for those struggling with ADHD as well, but it can be helpful for anyone who is having a hard time prioritizing themselves alongside a high workload.